I was laying in bed with the wife and dogs last night, just about to drift into the land of Zs when one of the 1,017 (actual number) voices that occupy my head on a given day decided to hold an Ed's Brain Town Hall meeting and referendum regarding my run.
First the Training Committee spoke up, admonishing me for running while sick yesterday. "Ed, you are 31 days away from the run you knucklehead...you need to take it easy! We want to chastise you for the official record. It was fool hardy and we don't approve!"
The Testosterone Committee angrily spoke over the Training Committee..."Only pansie asses don't run while hurt. Grow a pair will you???!!" The Testosterone Committee collectively murmured approvingly.....
"Read Unbroken and see if you have a reason to complain to Louie Zamperini about anything."
"We are running across the country people, this dude needs to toughen up."
"A little run while he is feverish, coughing up his lungs and generally hallucinating won't hurt him".
I tried to get control of the situation and banged the gavel.
"Ladies! Gentlemen! Order in the skull chamber!" "Will the Logistic's Committee report?"
"Yes Sir...for the 12th time this week, we report that your checklists for the checklists have been checked. Additionally, your equally OCD wife has provided additional check list checking." "The Logistics Commitee is tired and needs a break!"
The Donation Committee spoke up. "Sir, we are very worried. We have raised less than $3,500. We need another big push for donations to Freedom is Not Free. How are we going to get the word out? $10 per person would get us to the goal pretty fast if people could make that happen."
"Relax Donation Committee, I have faith that people as soon as I get started will help us reach our goal of helping Veterans across the US."
"The Appreciation Committee officially wants to thank Big Dog Running Company, John Teeples and the people of Columbus, Georgia. We have more interest in the run in Columbus apparently than anywhere else in the US. Columbus is putting it together in a big way!"
Any other Committees wish to report?
"Yes-sir! The Entertainment Committee reports that your Zune Player is now loaded with 6,000 songs, but we are distressed because you keep playing the Decemberist's new album "The King is Dead" over and over again. We fear you are going to wear out the 1's and 0's on the disk drive. Especially this song...
"No promises Entertainment, it is a darn good album. Maybe the best one I have heard in a year."
Any other committees? None? Meeting adjourned. I want to be asleep before the Housewives of Beverly Hill's Reunion Part 1 starts. I hate Camille........
E
This is freaking awesome. By any chance can I find this meeting archived online? ;)
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious! Your voices should provide lots of entertainment on your upcoming run!
ReplyDelete